Episode #310 "Your Father Should Know"

When Sean hears from Mr. O'Keefe that Brad and Lily are having sex, he pretends he already knows but is, in fact, astonished at this news. He's even more astonished when he realizes that Claudia has known about Lily and Brad for quite a while. It's the last straw when he finds out that Eddie also knows. Clearly everyone knew but Sean. Eddie's surprised that Sean didn't notice how comfortable Brad was getting around the house. Claudia says, in her own defense, that she didn't dare tell Sean. He would have lost his temper, killed Brad and ended up in jail. Sean protests that he's not a hothead, but Claudia, from experience, knows that he is. Claudia says that daughters tell their mothers stuff they don't tell their dads. Sean does dad stuff: kill spiders, fix doors and yell. Sean wonders what else he doesn't know. Is Henry married? Has Jimmy joined the army? It's then revealed that Henry has used Sean's and Eddie's collection of Liberty quarters in a gumball-type vending machine in an attempt to get a digital watch. Lily's mortified when Claudia tells her that her dad now knows her secret. Lily wants to know if Sean is freaking out. Is she about to be sent to a convent? They look out Lily's window to see Brad lying on the ground with a plastic angel on top of him, part of the Christmas decorations that Sean's putting up on the roof. Sean tells Eddie that the angel hit Brad in the nose and drew a little blood. Eddie has stolen the vending machine and is prying it open so Henry can retrieve the quarters from the coin collection. Sean wants to get this straight: Eddie's teaching the kids to respect others' property by stealing the property of others? Brad tells Lily that her dad tried to kill him, but Sean protests that it was an accident. Brad tells Lily that Sean was like a crazed beast. Mr. O'Keefe asks Sean about the angel incident, and it becomes clear to Lily that Mr. O'Keefe also knows about her and Brad. Mr. O'Keefe demands that Sean admit that the idea of Brad and Lily having sex is driving him crazy. Lily can't believe that Brad would tell his dad about them. Brad says he just kind of blurted it out when his dad was screaming at him for being a dumbass. But now Sean's going to kill him for sure. Sean tries to reassure Lily that he's not out to get Brad, but he wonders why Lily went to Claudia and not him. Lily says that's not the way it was; Claudia caught Brad in Lily's room wearing Lily's pink bathrobe. It was pretty obvious. Sean wants Lily to tell him just one tiny thing she hasn't told her mom. She shows him a tiny heart tattoo on her neck, under her hair, that Claudia doesn't know about. Sean's swears he'll keep the secret, but Claudia knows in a matter of minutes and goes looking for Lily.