Episode #413 "An Eric Forman Christmas"

When Kitty asks Eric what he wants for Christmas, he asks for a cassette player for the Vista Cruiser, although he’s sure that what he’ll get is a raincoat. Kitty says he sounds as if he needs a little Christmas cheer, so she’s signed him up to direct the church Christmas pageant. Eric reluctantly agrees to take on the job, and Kitty makes Hyde feel guilty enough to say he’ll help. At the first rehearsal, Pastor Dave can’t understand why he’s been replaced as pageant director and why the board doesn’t feel he speaks for the younger generation. Kelso is excited about all the upcoming TV Christmas specials, but everyone teases him about being a little kid. Jackie announces that she wants to play the Virgin Mary and ride a unicorn; Hyde opts for the baby Jesus, so he can just lie there and do nothing; Kelso wants to be Joseph but would like to play him as a spaceman rather than a carpenter. Red and Kitty are awakened by flashing Christmas lights and blaring Christmas music, courtesy of a drunken Bob Pinciotti. At play rehearsal, Donna protests that she has to play a wise man. Weren’t there any wise women? Fez wonders why the foreign guy always has to play the shepherd; it doesn’t seem fair. When Red steals all Bob’s Christmas decorations intending to throw them away, Kitty calls him the Grinch. Eric tells Leo that he’s being driven crazy by his friends and their weird ideas about the pageant. He fantasizes a beach scene where Fez is the lifeguard, Jackie comes in on roller skates, Laura and Hyde roll up on a Harley with Laura carrying a baby girl Jesus. A spaceship lands, and Kelso appears dressed as a space wiseman. Eric tells Leo that he thinks he’ll just go home, but Leo says he can’t quit. Directing the pageant is Eric’s chance to spread the spirit of Christmas. The guys have been dipping into the “frankincense,” and Eric tells them they’re going to do the play the way it was meant to be done. No spacemen. Anyone who doesn’t like it is no friend of his! Pastor Dave comes in, takes one whiff of the air and freaks out. He recognizes that smell from the AC/DC concert. Eric’s fired! Pastor Dave tells Donna that he has no choice but to take over as pageant director. The gang ties Pastor Dave to a chair with Christmas lights. Bob yells at Red in the driveway and demands his decorations back. Eric wonders if everyone can’t just act decent for one day of the year. Dave is still tied up with the lights, and Hyde tells Leo that they’re about to light the Dave. Leo’s disgusted, the gang has managed to hassle Eric so much that they’ve ruined Christmas. Kelso tells Jackie he like to go home and watch Rudolph on TV, but Jackie scoffs that those shows are for babies. Michael needs to grow up. Feeling guilty, Donna, Hyde and Fez take off to find Eric but light up Dave before they go. Back at the Formans, Kitty gives Eric a present in a box shaped just like a cassette player; he opens it to discover a raincoat. Kelso has a stop-motion animated fantasy of a winter wonderland in which he tells Santa, Rudolph and The Little Drummer Boy that he can’t watch them on TV anymore, because all his friends are making fun of him and saying that he’s a baby. Santa says that’s nonsense. As long as Kelso really, really believes in their magical world, nothing in life can ever hurt him. Kelso, ecstatic, takes off into the air, flies a few seconds and is then stuck by lightning. He drops from the sky, landing stunned in Santa’s arms. Kelso wakes up and sees Pastor Dave still tied up. Kelso frees him from the chair. The gang arrives at Eric’s with Leo and Pastor Dave bringing the cassette player that Eric’s been dreaming about. They tell him he’s re-hired as pageant director, and they’ll do everything they can to help him make the pageant a success.